The TATTGOC Mixed Grill Of Spicy News

Thursday, May 23, 2013 | Posted by Trampy |
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 Short but sweet, it's time for a TATTGOC round-up of curry news. Lots of people recently pointed us towards reports that Princess Catherine (nee Kate Middleton) was apparently having mucho preggers cravings for vegetable curry but we're a respectable, award-winning curry blog, not some tabloid gutter rag. We're BETTER THAN THAT! So we're going to stick to the high-class stuff for now, starting with the latest updates from the looming Scottish Curry Awards 2013 ...
A carnival atmosphere: McKie's in the middle

 As you probably know, the Scottish Curry Awards will take place on June 10 at a central Glasgow location, and while the finalists in each category are just about to be announced, we can reveal a few juicy tidbits. The 2013 awards will now apparently include a "Best of Edinburgh" category, similar to the pre-existing "Best of Glasgow" (most recently won by former TATTGOC target Charcoals). The awards have also confirmed the host for the evening, award-winning DJ Liz McKie, who presents an evening show syndicated across Clyde FM, Forth FM, Radio Borders and the rest of the Bauer Network. There have been some memorable Scottish Curry Awards hosts in the past – who can forget Andy Cameron complimenting/making fun of The Tramp's beard in 2010? – but McKie is a dedicated pro, which is a good sign. So roll on June 10, and keep up-to-date with everything that's happening at the Scottish Curry Awards 2013 by keeping an eye on www.lovecurry.info
You will not see this expression because you will be wearing a blindfold


 A little later in June, Merchant City restaurant KoolBa is hosting a special "dining in the dark" event with Hardeep Singh Kholi, who has been getting decent write-ups for his performances across the UK which combine home cooking and comedy chat. On June 19, he'll be guiding blindfolded KoolBa diners through an epic seven-course journey of Middle Eastern and Indian dishes that promise to transport you from Persia to the Punjab, with your senses working overtime. Certainly, the idea of an official TATTGOC outing where everyone wears a blindfold is quite appealing. Tickets for this very special KoolBa event cost £30 and should be bought in advance from the restaurant. You can follow those guys on Twitter at www.twitter.com/KoolBa
From the Guardian review: "I actually ate more of this than I strictly needed to, which speaks volumes"

Here at TATTGOC, we're more likely to head out to an amazing local curryhouse or whip up an breathtaking curry from scratch in TATTGOC Towers than pick up our tea from a supermarket. And yet, apparently supermarket meals are having a real impact on the culinary landscape, with a research firm claiming that visits to "ethnic restaurants and takeaways" had dropped by a staggering 123m between 2009 and 2012. The Guardian's excellent Word Of Mouth blog ran its own series of tests, bamming up supermarkets to send over their meal-for-two curry wares and reviewing them in nominally fair-handed, if ultimately pretty withering style. Not sure if we would have used "Better than bog standard curry?" as a recurring motif, but this was a pretty good cousin to our own Tastin' With The Tramps feature. Particularly liked the hilarious, slightly heartbreaking phrase "tiny naans, like children's mittens". You can read the whole sorry tale HERE. 

 That's the end of our news buffet. Next Thursday: the official write-up of TATTGOC's May outing, which sees us return to the city centre ...

 SOME OTHER RECENT TATTGOC POSTS
Exploring #PakoraWednesday With Robert Florence
Dhansaks With Wolves – The City Hungry To Win Curry Capital 2013
Just One Week Left To Vote In The Scottish Curry Awards 2013!
Classic Curry Source: The List Eating And Drinking Guide Hits 20
Mother India: The Movie
A Spicy Bite Before My Bloody Dhalentine
We've Got The Skinny On The Scottish Curry Awards 2013
The Tramps Go Trippin' With Tony Singh
Valentine's Curry: The Vindalook Of Love
Sam Thing's Happening Here ... And Team Tramp Is Cooking Up A Storm
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Exploring #PakoraWednesday With Robert Florence

Thursday, May 16, 2013 | Posted by Trampy |
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Burnistoun's Quality Polis tuck into some quality pakora (the kitchen was spotless)

It started, as so many things do these days, with a tweet. Robert Florence – gifted writer, versatile comic actor, self-proclaimed gamesmaster, wrestling evangelist, Prince superfan and perhaps North Glesga's foremost selfie merchant – announced his latest crowdsourced happening to his 34,500 or so followers on Sunday May 12.



Like his comedy peer Limmy, Florence occasionally uses Twitter as a mass dispersal wind-up device on a touchscreen hairtrigger. But when it comes to things he loves, he loves them with a naked, almost disarming passion. And despite moulding himself into a sinewy weapon for his forthcoming Kelvin Brawl smackdown, the dude loves pakora. It featured heavily in Burnistoun's Quality Polis sketches, and halfway through his videogame house party/chatshow Empty at Glasgow Film Festival 2013, trays of Mother India's finest pakora were passed among the appreciative crowd.

 So #PakoraWednesday looked like being a thing, with Florence issuing encouragement over Twitter, and laying out some ground rules. On Wednesday May 15, participants would phone their local Indian takeaway and order some pakora of their choice, then discuss what arrived, sharing their opinions and pics using the #PakoraWednesday hashtag, although some folk struggled with the 9pm starting gun.



For the inaugural event, Florence ordered from the Star five-in-one takeaway in Burmulloch, and even snapped a pic with his delivery female. We won't embarrass her by reproducing it here, but, seriously, check out the size of the Star portions. Muckle.

Most people got into the spirit of the event. Check out this formidable Marmaris payload. 



The recently opened Afghan Village on the Southside got a thumbs-up too.



 As Twitter is also an inherently voyeuristic medium, there were also glimpses of some nice plates.



 It was a frank and open forum to exchange views – a place for jokes, for criticism, for declarations, even accusations. Haggis vs mushroom vs chicken. There was absurdity ...




 ... and what seemed like genuine anger.




 There were also some pretty incredible home-made efforts. We liked this one.



 And Takeaway Secret author Kenny McGovern shared an interesting-looking recipe.



Unfortunately, the Tramps themselves were unable to take part – TATTGOC-affiliated fitba takes place on Wednesday nights and after the demands of high-tempo five-a-side it's all they can do to move, let alone eat. The three-hour games also take over the whole night. The Tramp did share his all-time pakora recommendation though.



 For the full story, simply search the #PakoraWednesday hashtag and click "all tweets", allowing you to relive the event practically in real time. But will this be a one-off or a continuing weekly or monthly event, especially with Florence's wrestling date looming next month? Let's leave the last word to @choobanicus.



SOME OTHER RECENT TATTGOC POSTS
Dhansaks With Wolves – The City Hungry To Win Curry Capital 2013
Just One Week Left To Vote In The Scottish Curry Awards 2013!
Classic Curry Source: The List Eating And Drinking Guide Hits 20
Mother India: The Movie
A Spicy Bite Before My Bloody Dhalentine
We've Got The Skinny On The Scottish Curry Awards 2013
The Tramps Go Trippin' With Tony Singh
Valentine's Curry: The Vindalook Of Love
Sam Thing's Happening Here ... And Team Tramp Is Cooking Up A Storm
The Scots Serving Up Curry Around The World
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Dhansaks With Wolves – The City Hungry To Win Curry Capital 2013

Thursday, May 09, 2013 | Posted by Trampy |
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The Tramps may have altered this image slightly

Christmas. It seems to come earlier every year. But you know what else comes earlier, and demonstrably so? The voting has barely closed on the Scottish Curry Awards 2013, and the coveted Curry Capital competition has already kicked off. The final announcement won't take place until October 20, a full seven days after the conclusion of National Curry Week (which runs October 7-13). But the starting gun – or, if you like, a warning shot – has already been fired by the reliably third-placed Wolverhampton, nipping at the heels of our own fair city of Glasgow, who – after hoisting the trophy for a record fourth time in 2010 – have reliably placed second, behind Bradford, ever since.

 The 2013 competitive pool is bigger than ever, with London split into five separate regions competing against Birmingham, Leicester, Cardiff, Bradford, Manchester, Sheffield, Newcastle, Edinburgh, GLASGOW!!!, Liverpool, Leeds, Wolverhampton, Northampton and newcomers Brighton and Oxford.

 Though TATTGOC has never been officially involved with Glasgow's bid (giving our propaganda efforts "plausible deniability"), we've followed the competition in forensic detail since the big win in 2010. Here's how we've reported Glasgow's Curry Capital hallelujahs and the heartbreaks in the past, plus a reissue of our completely unofficial Curry Capital 2012 song supporting our favourite city: Glasgow, Baby.




Here are the important deets for 2013. As in years past, each city (or London region) will be represented by a team of four curryhouses, voted for by the public. That period of voting finishes August 2, with the teams being announced a week later on August 9. After that, it's voting for each city, which closes September 13. In a change from years past, the top three cities will be announced on the last day of National Curry Week, October 13. Representatives from those three cities will then be invited to London for the actual announcement and presentation of the trophy on October 20. If that all sounds like a lot to take in, don't worry – TATTGOC will keep you right.

 Perhaps determined to secure their place in at least the top three, the Wolverhampton campaign got off to a swift start on April 30 with a special launch that included a screening of The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel with the mayor in attendance, plus traditional dancing and some delicious curry. (We enjoyed this report from the night.) TATTGOC reckons it's always a good idea to keep an eye on Wolverhampton as their bids have always been innovative – they were the first ones to come up with a Curry Capital song, for example. Their dedicated website has been updated and is ready to go. And they've already enlisted the support of local microbrewery Black Country Ales.

 Needless to say, TATTGOC would love it if a local brewery teamed up with the Glasgow bid, ensuring a very special series of Tastin' With The Tramps posts ...

SOME OTHER RECENT TATTGOC POSTS
Just One Week Left To Vote In The Scottish Curry Awards 2013!
Classic Curry Source: The List Eating And Drinking Guide Hits 20
Mother India: The Movie
A Spicy Bite Before My Bloody Dhalentine
We've Got The Skinny On The Scottish Curry Awards 2013
The Tramps Go Trippin' With Tony Singh
Valentine's Curry: The Vindalook Of Love
Sam Thing's Happening Here ... And Team Tramp Is Cooking Up A Storm
The Scots Serving Up Curry Around The World
After The Gosht Of Xmas Past, It's The Sunday Post Of Xmas Present!
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REVIEW: Och Aye The Noor

Thursday, May 02, 2013 | Posted by Trampy |
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Cafe Noor, Shawlands

Greetings, traveller. Come closer to the fire, hunker down and warm thyself – because this is a tale of that rarest of beasts: a Friday night Curry Club, with all the enthusiasm and chaos that dangerous phrase entails. Since time immemorial (roughly, November 2008), the warriors, brigands and tricksters of TATTGOC have stuck, broadly, to the same routine: a monthly outing to an undiscovered curryhouse but always on a Thursday, so as to remain separate from that sacred entity known as "the weekend". Thursday is adrift enough to encourage participation, but with the ever-looming spectre of Friday rushing closer, it creates an organic shock absorber. Surely things won't spiral too much out of control, because those burly boys have got work in the morning. But every now and then, due to circumstance or veiled design, the template – the goddamn wheelbase of TATTGOC, if you like – is deviated from. And no-one deviates quite like the Curry Club ...


At what point did things get crazy? In the pub aforehand, the Tramps, Chasni Hawkes, Rogan Josh Homme, Ravi Peshwari, The Birmingham Wan, Rabbie Shankar and Bobo Balti seemed more shellshocked than mischievous, lounging in a comfortable, if eyewateringly expensive, Shawlands style bar. The moment where the world of TATTGOC spun off it axis came a little later, during the traditional starter order diktat. The French have a saying: one egg is an oeuf. But there was a time when just one egg was just too much for Curry Club, a moment where the reliably affable and mild-mannered Ravi Peshwari almost blew his stack when, through a dish delivery mix-up, he received a curry with a hard-boiled egg in it. So the spirt of Loki must have descended on The Tramp when, after deftly organising two different types of chef's special starters for the eight-strong squad, he also floated the possibility of ordering egg pakora, a notable rarity on the menus perused at Curry Clubs past. All eyes swivelled to Ravi who, with surprising nonchalance, merely responded with a mild: "Aye, alright then." Boom! If he was previously sitting on a wall, Humpty Dumpty was no longer there ...
The controversial egg pakora


OK, let's back it up a little. The squad were in Shawlands to visit Cafe Noor, apparently the oldest tandoori restaurant on the Southside and a longtime target of the Tramps. Situated opposite Shawlands Shopping Centre, Cafe Noor was traditional but, judging by the menu in the window, still had a few surprises to offer and gave the impression of old-fashioned service combined with more up-to-date decor. When TATTGOC arrive, there were already a few occupied tables, although two arrangements dominated the dining space – perpendicular tables situated to accommodate eight and ten souls respectively. By the time Curry Club had settled in and ordered the first round of pints, more punters had trailed in – suddenly, the places was practically fully occupied, a genuine rarity during TATTGOC's Thursday sorties.


The usual military operation looked ragged from the outset. There was a decision to crowdsource the pictures, allowing every member to get in on the shutterbug craze with their phones. Usually the entire club sticks to the same lager brand, but with a choice of Cobra and Kingfisher at Cafe Noor, and six hands shooting up enthusiastically for the hooded snake, Trampy opted for the beautiful river bird. As they are wont to say in the Assassin's Creed videogame franchise: "Nothing is true, everything is permitted." Perhaps concerned that the egg pakora would be a misfire, the Tramps added an additional order of mixed pakora to their starter slate; surely four dishes wouldn't represent a challenge to eight hungry Curry Clubbers, even if two of them were chef's platters? 
The sizzling tandoori chef's platter, a real sight to besniff


 The first chef's platter and mixed pakora arrived without incident. In truth, it was nothing the assembled weren't used to dealing with. The egg pakora caused more of a kerfuffle as Clubbers leaned in to work out quite how it was constructed. Then, after a pause, the second chef's platter arrived, a loudly sizzling tray that turned heads even in the busy restaurant. It gave off a delectable aroma of chargrill meat and seemed piled impossibly high. All thoughts of the egg pakora vanished as various delicious chunks were harpooned, everyone quick to praise the succulent meat and suddenly actually relieved that lamb chops – the regular TATTGOC starter yardstick – had been nowhere to be seen on the menu. Slowly though, once everyone reckoned they'd grasped their fair share of the good stuff, the attention turned to the egg pakora. Would Ravi Peshwari deign to try some? What on Earth would happen if he did?


With his natural flair for the theatrical, Ravi sliced up half of the egg pakora, eyeballed it on the end of his fork and then, in a one fluid motion, placed the morsel in his mouth. A few hesitant chews. A slight nodding (or perhaps a seizure?). With an emphatic swallow, he placed his fork back down. The entire table held its breath, unwilling to break the tension. "Aye," said Ravi. "It's alright." It was as if the Man From Del Monte had said "yes", or the Apollo 13 crew had reported a successful landing – a giddy feeling of celebration and relief sloshed around the table. Would Ravi like another piece of egg pakora? "Nah," said TATTGOC's moral compass. "You're alright."


If there had been an unusual intensity to the starter course, it soon morphed into a dim awareness that there was a considerable amount of scran to be got through. Not that it phased our heroes, but with hindsight the delicious and substantial chef's platters would probably have been sufficient, although the mixed pakora had its pleasures too. The topics offered up for discussion were varied – not least because no-one wanted to make a big deal about Ravi's dizzy adventure – but inevitably included the recent passing of Thatcher, the earlier death of M Night Shyamalan's career and the merits of David Simon's earnest, jazzy, occasionally indigestible Treme, a love letter to New Orleans. The nearby table of ten had been claimed by a group of distinguished gentlemen, who seemed to be old friends still enthused by the prospect of curry. It seemed a good omen.




Gazing at the mirrored pillars of Cafe Noor, Trampy realised that their near-periscopic angle created the illusion of some sort of portal. And perhaps because he'd guzzled more than his fair share of tandoori lamb, his addled mind shot off at an unexpected tangent. What if, in the act of ordering egg pakora, TATTGOC had created a rift in time and space and were in fact in the same room as their possible future selves, witnessing a meeting of TATTGOC+25? It wouldn't be the strangest thing to happen at a Curry Club meet-up. He shared his thought with the group, who then subtly scoped out the table of silvery gentlemen. "Naw," said Rogan Josh Homme eventually. "Look, all of them have still got hair." Compelling evidence indeed.

Nevertheless, the spirit of adventure was alive and well. From chicken tikka banjarat to a lamb kolkata from the regional specials, a fish and prawn curry to chicken tikka shakuti, to a curry with lamb chops on the bone and a sizzling tikka dish topped off with melted cheese, the currynauts ordered from every section of the detailed, extensive menu apart from the European selections. (A chap at the TATTGOC+25 table was tucking into scampi and chips and even from a distance, it looked pretty good.) The Tramp's ongoing keema obsession still had a vice-like grip on him, and he ended up ordering traditional mince and peas curry from the "on the bone" section, which sparked an almost philosophical discussion about what mince on the bone would be like.


Even with the restaurant practically full, the service at Cafe Noor remained unflappably smooth – all eight dishes arrived in quick succession, along with perhaps the most unusual rice/naan equation ever attempted at TATTGOC: five rice and one naan (although actually, the one naan was a special £10 mix of plain, garlic, peshari, chicken tikka and coriander naans that were thought to be enough for four). If that sounds like quite a lot of food, it was, although that glimpse into a curry-loving future where  there remained enthusiasm and cameraderie seemed to spur on the squad, who engaged with their dishes with gusto. No-one had gone for the Bombay curry cooked with egg and potato, however. Baby steps.


It was easy to see how Cafe Noor had not just survived but thrived – each Clubber raved about their dish and while Trampy had harboured reservations that five portions of rice would be way too much, when the dust settled, there was actually only naan left (which he wisely asked to be bagged up). Perhaps it was that Friday night magic, but there was a general consensus that this was on TATTGOC's most satisfying outings. The bill, when it arrived, was pretty high but that was most likely down to the £4.25 pints, of which 16 had been consumed. The Tramp's finance-sense must have been tingling, though; when he asked to look at the breakdown it took him put a minute to reveal, like Poirot identifying a murderer, that we'd been charged for 10 main dishes instead of 8 – literally, it seemed, our fates had become entwined with the TATTGOC+25 table.

 It didn't take long to sort out the mix-up, and in the end it was around £31 a head – more than some recent TATTGOC outings, sure, but ultimately a fantastic evening, where taboos and perhaps even hearts had been broken. There was an extended period of horseplay with the wrappers of the After Eight mints that involved using them to black out the teeth of various Clubbers, but those pictures really don't need to be seen. Luckily, those Noor-Do-Wells kept it serious for the final shot outside the restaurant:


TATTGOC visited Cafe Noor in April 2013


Cafe Noor
49 Kilmarnock Road, G41 3YN
ph: 0141 632 6407
www.cafe-noor.co.uk

SOME OTHER RECENT TATTGOC OUTINGS
Masala Twist, Hope Street
Kebabish, Victoria Road
Mister Singh's India, Elderslie Street
Akbar's, Charing Cross
Authentic(?) Curryhouse, Partick
Assam's Cafe, Edinburgh
Shezan, Cathcart Road
Charcoals, City Centre 
Cafe Darna, St George's Road
Kama Sutra, Sauchiehall Street
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